Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Always & Never Edward's Interview Chapter 4

Just to give you all fair warning, Edward’s probably not in a great place right now. Not that I can blame him, I mean how emo would you be if you were milliseconds away from fucking your hot, drunk best friend, that you’re secretly in love with, then just as your ready to pump her like a beach ball, she tells you she’s a virgin. *SCREEEECH* Then, like the big dumb ass you are, you freak the fuck out, making her think you just don’t want her. THEN…instead of just using your head, ya’ know the one with the brain in it, you let her have a melt down and storm out! And just because that wasn’t enough to make you want to jump off the highest bridge…while you’re on your way to go apologize, your sister stops you and tell you that you’re a no good, dirty mofo, heartbreaker . Whew…yeah…you’d total feel like shit after all that, right?

Well, that’s not the end of the story….to make things even WORSE…after you sneak into her room you find out she’s getting middle of the night messages, on a secret yahoo account, from a surprise visitor, who secretly came here to fly home with her, and just happens to keep reminding her that you’re an asshole. “Holyfuckingshit”…doesn’t even begin to describe how fucked up this situation is! So, yeah…Edward might not be in a “good” mood today! *inhales deeply* Yep, speaking of the sexy devil, I can smell the hot cinnamon coming down the hall now.

Krysti: Hello, Edward. Thank you for coming into the office today. I wasn’t sure if you’d actually show up.

Edward: *flops down in a chair, runs hand through hair and over face, pulls out cigarette lights it taking a long drag* I didn’t either Krysti. *Shakes head* I am here for two fucking reasons. First, B-girl would kick my ass if I didn’t come. Second….*Takes another long drag, shrugs* Everyone just assumes I’m the fucking asshole right now and I just don’t fucking want to be around any of them. Sorry Krys, no offense. *shy smile*

Krysti: And here I thought it was my irresistible personality and fuckhawt good looks that brought you here today! *smirks and dramatically flings her hair over her shoulder* I heard everyone’s being pretty rough on you right. Alice really let you have it, huh? Why didn’t you just tell Alice what happened and explain how you really feel about Bella?

Edward: *smirks at Krysti, cocking eyebrow* Fuckhawt huh? *shakes head and releases a barely audible chuckle* So, anyway Krys, about Alice… *rolls eyes* Alice is my twin but I fucking swear, sometimes it feels like she was adopted. She really tries to do the right thing, but fuck, I need my space sometimes. And she doesn’t know when to stop. I didn’t know what the fuck to say and I didn’t have time to get into. She is very close to Bella and she could slip up. I just can’t fucking chance that. I fuck things up enough on my own. Clearly, I don’t need anymore help in that department.*shakes head taking another long drag*

Krysti: *nods head in agreement* Edward, what are you going to do if Bella sleeps with someone else while you’re waiting around to grow big enough balls to tell her how you feel about her?

Edward: *glares at Krysti, leans forward snuffs out cigarette in ashtray, clenching fists* Krys, are you fucking kidding me right now?! This fucking interview is over *Gets ready to stand up, cocks questioning eyebrow at Krysti*

Krysti: *jumps out of her chair, pointing at him, daring him to cross her* OH, NO YOU DON’T!! I strongly suggest you just keep your ass in that chair and think about this shit. But, since I know you’re going through a lot of shit, I’ll move on for now but at some point you’re going to have to deal with that fact that Bella will sleep with someone.

Edward: *Sits back down, glaring at Krysti* That “someone” will be me and only me. Got that Krys? Next fucking question *clenching jaw*

Krysti: *puts hands up in surrendering* Fair enough. But I’m curious Edward, you said up until that night, Bella had never shown any signs of wanting you in that way. Are you seriously going to tell me that you had never even suspected or had the slightest hint that she was in to you, like that?

Edward: *Leans forward resting arms on knees* I don’t fucking know. I mean, I never really read into things to much. Bella and I were always joking around, hanging out. Fuck, I can’t tell you how many times we have slept next to each other. W-When you’re that close to someone, it’s a fine fucking line between what’s really going on and what you want to be going on. Ya’ know? *shrugs*

Krysti: I can relate to that. *rolls eyes* Speaking of what’s really going on, I listened to the song you sent Bella. Are you sure that was the right song to send her? I mean, it could be misinterpreted?

Edward: *Take in deep breath, exhales loudly, runs hands through hair* Fuck! Well, NOW I don’t know? I fucking thought it was at the time. Bella knows me and I would hope she would see what I meant by it…Shit Krys! What do you think?

Krysti: I don’t know, hun. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what happens. Well, you will be happy to know B-Girl has decided to let you skip the reader questions this week. She knows you're going through a lot right now and most of the questions would probably require you to go deeper into you're story then she thinks your ready to right now.

Edward: No shit? *nods head and flashes a crooked smirk* That’s why I fucking love B-Girl, she always looks out for me. *stands and walks to the door* Well, I guess we’re done then.

Krysti: I’ll see you next week, Edward. And good luck figuring out how to fix this mess. *returns wave to Edwards single wrist flick wave as he disappears down the hall*

Sexy, fuckin’ bastard is going to wear me out! *opens bottom desk drawer, pulls out a bottle of Stoli filling the empty coffee cup on her desk*

Don't forget to comment! I love to hear your thoughts on Edward and the interviews!


Brina said...

Drinking on the job huh? Nice!! Next time offer him a drink too and see where things go from there. I am sure he will relaz alittle bit and be more "free" with his choice of words. BTW, I love how you put in his place. Every womens dream tell edward where she wants him to out his ass. LOL on the note I am done!!

Love ya hun!!

nextstopsf said...

Awww-- I want to drink Stoli with Edward and comfort him--I am actually pretty good at helping figure out relationsip shit!! LOL!! Seriously!

LOVE it girls!! XOXO

bouncy72 said...

*Sigh* the poor guy. I'm really feeling bad for him. I hope Bella doesn't go & sleep with someone just "to get it done" or something. Argg I would seriously consider bitch slapping her if she does that. Hey please pass my love & a big hug on to him, & maybe give him some of that Stoli too. Shame, poor boy. Thanks for the interview ladies, what would we do with out these little insights & bloody funny comments. :)

HungryVampire said...

LOL No more Stoli for me... Gah!

I really do feel for Edward... He's got a lot on his plate to deal with. I hope he figures out a way to help Bella to understand.

Great interview...although I do wonder how your interviews would go if you had the Stoli BEFORE...

Great job!

*Stoli_Princess* said...

shit ill give that man allll the STOLI he wants! LMAOOO *lit"Rally* hehehe lova yall!!

Post a Comment